February 2013 Update

I am currently reading Louise Erdrich’s The Round House.  I had started Sherman Alexie’s latest book Blasphemy but somewhere I lost interest.  It was probably because I had read some of the poems in that volume in other volumes.  It didn’t really draw me in, like other books written by Sherman.  My favorite will always be The Summer of Black Widows.  I think that’s his best work, imho.  I am thoroughly enjoying The Round House.  It’s a little slow for my pace but it’s making me read at the pace set by the Author.  Very deliberate.

I’m surrounded by books. Literally piles of books.  I got six boxes of books so I unpacked and sorted these books.  I ordered some pretty awesome books.  I don’t have an ILS so I have to wait to circulate these new books.  I need to prepare them first anyway- barcodes, cover the book jackets and add them to the catalog.  Most of the books I ordered, I want to read.  As I was preparing the book jackets, a fleeting thought entered my head- Wow, I went to Library School and got my Master’s Degree to do this work?  And then I punctured the ego and deflated my head.  I’ll do a good job, no matter how mindless the task.  Often I get myself into trouble because of my ego and pride.  I don’t always do a good job of keeping that in check.  People sometimes get hurt when it escapes from me.

In other news, I’ve been to two Specialists for my hand, wrists and elbows.  Turns out that I don’t have Cubital Tunnel like I suspected.  I have a mild case of Carpal Tunnel, but nothing severe or damaged.  Next, my blood work ruled out other diseases like Rheumatoid Arthritis and Lupus.  That’s the good news.  The bad news- Doctors (Specialists) don’t know what is causing the severe debilitating pain in my wrists and elbows.  Doc said there’s something else going on in my system, masking itself as a musculoskeletal pain, affecting the nerves.  Oh great!  Meanwhile, somedays I survive only because of 800 mg of ibuprofen and my sheer will to get through the day.  I need patience as we cross off some possible causes for this problem.  I’m just tired and I get cranky when I’m tired.

Continuing on my stream of consciousness rant, earlier this week, I received some sad news of a fellow Indigenous Librarian Scholar’s passing.  Whenever someone we know passes onto into the next realm, I think it’s automatic to think of ourselves, a sort of assessment of what or where we are in life, making us pause and think about ourselves. Or perhaps it’s just me and my self-centered nature.  I was reading various e-mails about how wonderful this person was.  It’s natural to think or say wonderful things about someone who has passed on but in Ally’s case, all the kind words and descriptions were spot on.  I tried looking for a photo I know I had of Ally and I at a poster session she presented.  As a librarian, I’m ashamed to admit that my personal photo library is just messed up.  No meta-data, hardly any organization so I couldn’t find the photo I had of Ally and myself.  She was a really nice lady with a ready smile.  When I first met Ally, I wasn’t the nicest person.  Let’s face it, I’m normally not the warmest or nicest person.  I’m very cautious of who I let into my weird little world so I will be borderline standoffish and occasionally crossing over into “jerk” territory.  It’s a defense mechanism – I reject you first before you have a chance to reject me.  Yeah, I need to grow up.  So, back to Ally (see how it’s all about me again), even after I was kind of a jerk to her, she was still nice to me.  We did a project together in one of our Grad classes and I discovered what a wonderful human being she was.  I’m sad I won’t see her open and welcoming smile again in this world but I’m sure she had to move on to the next world.

With that ending, I have to re-affirm that I hope to see you sometime soon.  I urge you all to be good to each other and yourselves.  Hug and laugh and enjoy each other.

A totally unrelated photo below-

This picture was taken from the Walk Track near my office.  Vultures were circling overhead and I thought about what poor creature died.


About bibiiwens

Navajo, self-assured, bibliophile, skeptical, analytical and klutzy.
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One Response to February 2013 Update

  1. wyz says:

    bleh bleh bleh! 🙂

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